A new review has been published Sexual medicine journal We provide evidence that masturbation functions as a complex psychological and sexual coping strategy for people who have broken up with their romantic partners. This study suggests that while solo sex can help manage stress and maintain intimacy while physically separated, its impact on relationship satisfaction is highly dependent on a person’s cultural background, gender, and frequency of sex.
In relationships where partners live apart, opportunities for face-to-face physical intimacy are often limited. Because of this separation, individuals often seek alternative ways to manage their sexual desires and maintain an emotional connection with their partner. Although masturbation is a common alternative, its specific psychological and relational effects remain somewhat misunderstood.
“Long-distance relationships are becoming increasingly common, especially among students, migrant workers, healthcare workers, and couples separated by work or academic commitments,” says study author Sennikon Pakpahan, assistant professor of andrology and sexology at Airlangga University in Indonesia, doctoral candidate at the University of Barcelona in Spain. “However, discussions about sexuality in long-distance relationships often focus primarily on communication techniques and relationship satisfaction, while solitary sexual behaviors such as masturbation remain relatively understudied and often stigmatized.”
The authors noted that previous research has not sufficiently examined how this behavior specifically works in the context of separated couples. Most previous studies simply described the frequency of masturbation and did not consider how the behavior affected the mental health of the relationship. The authors recognized the need to investigate whether this practice actually helps or hurts couples’ bonds.
“We were interested in exploring whether masturbation in this context simply acts as a substitute for sex with a partner, or whether it may also serve broader psychological and relational roles, such as addressing loneliness, stress, emotional detachment, and unmet intimacy needs,” Pakpahan said.
To answer these questions, the researchers conducted a systematic review of existing scientific literature. A systematic review is a rigorous type of research that collects and analyzes all available research on a particular topic to find consistent patterns. The team searched 12 major academic databases for articles published in English or Indonesian.
They selected 14 eligible studies for the final analysis, which together included approximately 9,000 participants. These participants were adults aged 18 years and older who were experiencing physical separation from their partner. Some were in traditional long-distance relationships, while others were separated by pandemic-related quarantine restrictions.
Pandemic restrictions have effectively forced many cohabiting couples into a situation similar to long-distance relationships. These people experienced a sudden loss of intimacy with their partners as social distancing regulations prevented them from physically interacting with each other. This unique historical event provided researchers with a wealth of data on how humans sexually adapt to forced isolation.
The included studies utilized a variety of research designs, including quantitative surveys, qualitative interviews, and mixed methods approaches. Quantitative research relies on numerical data and statistics, while qualitative research uses open-ended questions to deeply explore individuals’ experiences. The researchers extracted detailed information from each article, including participants’ age, relationship status, frequency of masturbation, and measures of mental health.
The measures used across these 14 studies varied widely. Many researchers have used online self-report questionnaires in which participants rate their behaviors and emotions on a numbered scale. Other studies have employed in-depth qualitative interviews to collect detailed personal narratives. The scientists then analyzed these diverse data points to identify recurring themes and connections.
“What surprised us is that despite the prevalence of long-distance relationships around the world, the literature remains limited and fragmented,” Pakpahan told SciPost. “And while masturbation is often discussed in a highly biological or highly moral way, a number of studies suggest that masturbation may also have important emotional, relational, and adaptive aspects.”
Analyzes revealed clear gender differences in frequency and motivation for practice. Men consistently reported masturbation more frequently than women, and this trend was even more pronounced during periods of physical separation. Men stated that they primarily engaged in behaviors for biological release, reaching orgasm, and reducing physical tension.
For many men, this solitary activity was often accompanied by visual stimulation, such as pornography. Women, on the other hand, reported broader and more emotional motivations. Women said they use masturbation for relaxation, improving sleep quality, relieving mental stress, and feeling close to a distant partner.
“Our findings suggest that masturbation in long-distance relationships is not simply a replacement for sex with a partner,” Pakpahan said. “For many people, it can serve as a coping and adaptation strategy to help manage sexual desire, emotional stress, feelings of loneliness, and long-term physical separation.”
This review provides evidence that the relationship between masturbation and sexual satisfaction is highly variable. When practiced in moderation, this behavior tends to correlate with positive outcomes such as increased body awareness, increased sexual self-esteem, and improved relationship harmony. Some couples used technology such as video calls to engage in mutual masturbation, which helped them maintain emotional intimacy.
Data suggests that excessive solo masturbation does not produce similar positive results. In some of the studies analyzed, people who performed the act daily or multiple times a day reported lower overall sexual satisfaction. This high frequency of solitary activity was associated with decreased physical arousal when eventually reunited with a partner.
“At the same time, the impact seems to be highly context-dependent,” Pakpahan noted. “Factors such as relationship quality, communication, personal beliefs, cultural values, and frequency of engagement can influence whether masturbation is experienced as supportive, neutral, or potentially distressing within a relationship.”
The researchers also found significant differences based on cultural geography. “Another interesting finding was the contrast in cultural backgrounds,” Pakpahan said. “Although in many Western studies, masturbation was generally framed as a relatively neutral or adaptive sexual behavior, in some Eastern contexts it was more strongly associated with guilt, prejudice, religious norms, or concerns about relationship harmony.”
In Western countries such as the United States, Spain, and Germany, masturbation was generally considered to be a socially adapted and culturally evolved behavior. Participants in these regions tended to see this practice as a healthy expression of personal autonomy and a practical way of coping with distance.
In eastern countries such as Malaysia and Indonesia, this custom was strongly influenced by religious and sociocultural norms. In these regions, strict moral frameworks and collectivist values prioritize marital fidelity and modesty. Collectivistic values emphasize the needs and goals of groups and families over the personal desires of individuals.
Because of this cultural framework, solo masturbation was often associated with guilt, shame, and moral tension. In these Eastern contexts, individuals often considered mutual masturbation within marriage an acceptable way to prevent infidelity. However, performing this practice alone could cause internal conflicts and emotional tension due to religious doctrine.
Although this review provides detailed insight, the authors noted several limitations in the available studies. “Most of the available studies are cross-sectional and rely on self-reported data, which limits causal interpretation,” Pakpahan said. “Furthermore, many studies focus on specific populations, such as young people or online survey participants, so the results may not apply equally to all couples or age groups.”
Because the data are cross-sectional, it is impossible to say with certainty whether excessive masturbation causes psychological distress or whether people who are in distress simply masturbate more often. Another limitation involves the method of data collection. Relying on self-report questionnaires can lead to inaccurate results if participants feel embarrassed or underreport their actual behavior.
The authors also noted a lack of diversity regarding sexual orientation in the current literature. Most of the data focuses on heterosexual couples, leaving gaps in our understanding of how sexual minority people navigate long-distance relationships. The researchers suggest that future research should explicitly examine how different sexual orientations affect these relationship dynamics.
“Importantly, our research does not suggest that masturbation universally improves or harms relationships,” Pakpahan said. “Its meaning and effect appear to be highly dependent on broader relational, psychological, and sociocultural contexts.”
“It is also important to recognize that sexual behavior is shaped by an individual’s values, cultural background and religious beliefs,” Pakpahan continued. “For some people, masturbation may serve as a healthy coping or adaptive strategy, but for others it may conflict with deeply held moral or spiritual values.”
If this internal conflict leads to persistent guilt, shame, or psychological distress, it can harm rather than support psychological well-being. “For this reason, discussions about sexuality should remain sensitive to individual contexts, rather than assuming a single universal perspective,” Pakpahan added.
Future research would benefit from using more diverse measurement tools. Scientists recommend incorporating longitudinal studies that follow couples who have been separated for long periods of time. We also suggest using objective behavioral indicators, such as digital tracking and hormonal indicators, to complement self-report surveys.
“We are interested in exploring how sexual coping strategies and adaptations to intimacy function in different relationship and life situations, such as long-distance relationships, infertility, aging couples, and major changes in health status,” Pakpahan said. “More broadly, we hope to contribute to a more holistic understanding of sexuality that integrates biological, psychological, relational, and sociocultural perspectives.”
The study, “Masturbation as a sexual and psychological coping strategy in long-distance relationships: A systematic review,” was authored by Nur HS Kusuma, Dicky F. Irnandi, Cennikon Pakpahan, and Thi Tu An Nguyen.
