A new study from Michigan State University challenges the common assumption that narcissists gradually damage relationships over time.
The study used longitudinal data to follow more than 5,000 couples for up to six years. Participants completed a questionnaire measuring two aspects of narcissism: narcissistic admiration and narcissistic competitiveness.
Narcissists have two different ways of maintaining an exaggerated positive self-perception. They may exaggerate themselves to impress others (narcissistic admiration) or put others down to show that they are better than them (narcissistic competitiveness). ”
Gwendolyn Seedman, lead author of the study and associate professor in the MSU Department of Psychology
The study, published in the Journal of Personality, found that narcissistic rivalry traits were consistently associated with lower relationship satisfaction for both partners, but in contrast to previous research, narcissistic praise had no meaningful effect on either partner’s satisfaction.
Additionally, the study found that even in couples where one partner scored high on narcissism, the rate of decline was less steep. This suggests that the long-term effects of narcissism on romantic relationships may play out in more subtle ways than previously thought.
The study also looked at couples who had been together for less than a year and found that narcissistic traits had no relationship to satisfaction.
“We often think that narcissists are charming at first but gradually damage relationships over time,” Seidman said. “Our findings suggest that the reality may be more complex.” “Perhaps there is some kind of tipping point in the relationship, where circumstances change and satisfaction plummets, or the ‘honeymoon’ period with the narcissist becomes longer. Another possibility is that the harm caused by the narcissist is not directly manifested in the partner’s overall relationship satisfaction. For example, the narcissist may gradually erode the partner’s self-esteem and sense of agency.”
The researchers hope that by understanding how personality traits shape relationship experiences, clinicians and other researchers will be able to better understand why some relationships fail and how partners influence each other’s well-being over time.
sauce:
michigan state university
Reference magazines:
Seidman, G., & Chopik, W. J. (2026). From Spark to Strain? Changes in relationship satisfaction as a function of narcissistic admiration and rivalry. personality journal. DOI: 10.1111/jopy.70065. https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jopy.70065
